This year, Halloween falls on a Friday. How fun! My kids will be trick-or-treating, eating candy, staying up late, and, if I’m lucky, sleeping in a little bit on Saturday morning.
The weekend ahead provides a great opportunity to decorate for the next holiday—which, in case this is not clear—is not Christmas.
I get that it’s tempting to jump straight into Christmas movies, hot chocolate, and Jingle Bells… but the next holiday is Thanksgiving. And it deserves its own celebration.
Thanksgiving may be the greatest of American holidays. It should unite all people, regardless of religion or background, in an intentional focus on gratitude and togetherness.
In fact, I’d argue that we need Thanksgiving more now than ever. Cicero called gratitude the “parent of all virtues.” A grateful disposition is an excellent defense against the covetousness, commercialism, and consumption that have come to dominate American life and even other holidays.
On Halloween, my kids are interested in getting candy. And while my family places great emphasis on our religious traditions around Christmas, I’d be lying if I said that the gifts weren’t a big part of our celebration, and my kids are very interested in getting gifts.
But Thanksgiving isn’t about what you get. It’s about what you already have. In this sense, it’s the perfect precursor to Christmas or Hanukkah, both of which involve gifts. After we take some time in November to dwell on all that we have, we have a better perspective on these December gift-oriented holidays and can focus more on giving (from all we have) than receiving.
One of my favorite Thanksgiving rituals is daily efforts to name and count our blessings. Our family does this with a “Thankful Turkey;” we add new feathers each day in November. After some obvious blessings like our health, family, and home, we start to dig deeper in the second and third weeks of the month. We are so thankful for electricity! For warm, clean water. For our jobs, and our income. For our school, our teachers, our extended family, for sunshine!
Thankfulness isn’t just an antidote for greed; it’s also helpful for alleviating anxiety. The world is often an anxious place, but when we put on gratitude goggles, we force ourselves to look for the positive. Studies show that practicing gratitude reduces cortisol levels, depression, and anxiety.
Thanksgiving, traditionally, involves imagery of pilgrims and Native Americans feasting together. The incomplete and sometimes sugar-coated myths surrounding the early shared feasts between Native tribes and European pilgrims are probably one reason why schools and society in general may be tempted to de-emphasize the Thanksgiving holiday.
But! We can acknowledge a more complicated history surrounding American colonization without abandoning a holiday that can teach us so much about coming together, counting our blessings, and feasting.
Thanksgiving is also rooted in family togetherness. When Sarah Josepha Hale campaigned to have Thanksgiving made an official U.S. holiday, her focus was on family togetherness, gathering around a table together. During a time when we are tempted to cut people out of our lives because of political disagreement or other discomfort, Thanksgiving should challenge us to overcome these differences. In fact, President Abraham Lincoln instituted the official holiday just after the Civil War—another time in our history when division dominated.
We don’t have to talk politics at the Thanksgiving dinner table to enjoy one another and be a family. In fact, communal eating has a great history of building social trust. And psychologically, it does! Food is a language of care and connection for many people. We should let that language be loud, and keep the political conversations to a soft and respectful volume.
Thanksgiving is beautiful because of its simplicity, but its simplicity may be why it doesn’t get the glitz and glam of the other two holidays it’s situated between. I’m not advocating for glamming up Thanksgiving with blow-up turkey decorations in our yards. But I am pleading with you: Don’t miss the opportunity to dive deeper into gratitude (and, if you have kids, to model to them how to do this). Don’t jump straight to Christmas or New Year’s.
Instead, take some time to reflect on all that is good in your life and break bread with your loved ones at home. Don’t skip out on the joys of Thanksgiving!